Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Friendships Through All Seasons

"Friendships that truly stand the test of time are those that survive every season. The Good. The Bad. And the Boring." (c) Chanel Bastfield

It took several weeks of going back and forth with whether to blog about friendships. I'm not sure why but I know someone like myself needs to read this. Over the past few years I have paid very close attention to my friendships. Those that came and went. And those that have stood the test of time. I've had some friendships  literally last only a season. It was fun while it lasted but for whatever reason they are no longer in my life. No love's just the way life played out. 
Then there are those friendships that have been a constant in every stage of my growth and development into adulthood. That being, grade school friend's and friends that I have met in the past few years who are like my family. I have a hand-full of friends with whom I share over 30 years of life, experience and unbreakable bonds. 
The friendships that have stood over 30 years are in fact those that survived every season of my life. When I was young dumb and stupid, when I was the party animal, when I answered to no one but myself as well as my current seasons of maturity. Which are; the seasons of surrendering my life to Christ. The seasons of me being settled and not wanting to party all the time or hang out. The seasons of focusing on family, my career and my education. The seasons of just wanting to live the best life I can live void of as much drama as possible.
Yes, the true test of friendships are those that no matter what comes or what goes...they survive. That I've found is the key. They survive. 
Friends bicker, friends don't always see eye-to-eye, friend's don't always speak every single day. But...friends respect each other and always have each other's best interest at heart. They are there for each other through good times and bad. They realize that even when things aren't perfect between them they are truly friends and nothing can come between that. Most importantly, you always communicate how you feel and never let petty misunderstandings come between you. If that happens the "friendship" needs to be re-evaluated. 
No, you may not be as close as you were in high school but you still check in on each other. No, you may not talk every day but you still send an email saying "hello." No, you may not be at each other's house every weekend but you still make time to meet up for lunch. No, you may not even talk for several weeks but at some point you check in to make sure everything is okay. Life, children, marriages, relocation, health, finances...they all have a way of putting pressure on friendships. But true friends understand.
Those are indeed the types of seasons most friendships go through. And only the strong ones will survive when life brings change. They morph and grow into what the friendship needs to be. They blossom into whatever form they need to take to nurture the people involved. 
Friendship dynamics may change but the loyalty, respect and love between them do not. If you want to know if you currently have one of those blessed friendships; simply let life unfold and see how they morph. 


1 comment:

  1. You were right... I needed to read that. I have been struggling with the loss of friendships lately. I guess it comes down to if the friendship is meant to last then I will talk to that person again and our differences will fade away or get resolved. People grow apart but that doesn't mean that the friendship disappears. I still care about each and every friend I have ever had. I just know that sometimes our seasons take us in opposite directions. Like any relationship, if it is meant to be it will be. (But I also need to stop being so stubborn & reach out to some people.)

    Thanks for sharing!